Helping Kids Behave Part Eleven 

¨      ENSURE STUDENT SELF-CONTROL:   Use empathy and praise. Give the student a few minutes to calm down. You may also, when possible, give the student the option of seeing the school counselor rather than going to the office. The next section will talk about self- control strategies in more detail.

¨      ENGAGE STUDENT IN FOLLOW-UP TEACHING OR PROBLEM SOLVING. Talk to them about their behavior. Discuss strategies that will help them in the future. See the "What do I want" form (appendix B).

Again all of this is based on having a relationship with the child!

Student self-control

Youth who are aggressive and antisocial are often highly agitated. This frequently puts them into conflict with both adults and peers. They seem to carry intense levels of anger and sometimes rage.

Some act out because they have been abused. They also carry feelings of alienation and may have great difficulty controlling these emotions effectively,  (Walker, Colvin & Ramsey in Davis, Nelson, & Gauger, 2000).

In fact these tantrums, confrontations, and other inappropriate behaviors have worked well for them in that they have learned that these behaviors cause other people to back away, allowing them to have their own way in situations.

This makes it difficult for them to replace the inappropriate behaviors with appropriate ones. To teach the strategies, begin when the youth is calm and not misbehaving.

Then, identify a self-control strategy for the list below and give an example of how it can be used. Describe and demonstrate the steps of each strategy for the student. Ask if the student understands what you are saying and then have the youth practice using the strategy in a pretend situation.

Finally, give feedback and reinforce the behavior.

¨ Deep-Breathing

a) Silently count to five as you take a deep breath in through your nose.

b) Hold the breath in for five seconds.

c) Count to five again and let the breath out slowly.

d) Take two breaths normally.

e) Repeat steps a-d two or three times until you feel yourself calming down.

f) Tell an adult when you are calm.

¨ Drawing or Writing in a Journal

A) Find someplace where you won’t be disturbed.

B) Draw a picture that shows how you are feeling or write down how you are feeling.

C) When you are calm tell an adult.

Please note that this technique should not be used with LD children who have problems in written expression or with students who have visual-motor problems.

Helping Kids Behave Part Twelve
Helping Kids Behave Part Ten
Creative Counseling Home

Disclaimer: This website and its content is intended for trained licensed mental health professionals and school certified mental health professionals to use for their clients / students at their own discretion.

*If you ignore the disclaimer above are using these techniques on yourself and you feel any discomfort or upset it is highly suggested that you seek out a licensed  mental health professional immediately.

"Beyond Art Therapy" is the concept from Dr. Stangline that combines all creative fields in therapy. It is not the traditional "art therapy" but goes beyond to include sand tray therapy, play therapy, mindfulness, meditation, color therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, and a vast majority of other therapies.

For any other type of mental health emergency call your local 911 / Police Number immediately.

Dr. Stangline does not offer advice / suggestions to anyone who is not a professional mental health provider, or a student who is studying this field and has questions about mental health programs of study.

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