Helping Kids Behave
Part Thirteen


·         STOP doing, what you are doing, if it is causing a problem.

·         THINK of another better choice of behavior.

·         TELL yourself to make the better choice.

·         REWARD yourself for making a better choice.


·         Take a calm, rational approach to the situation.

·         Actively listen to the other people involved.

·         Express your feelings using the guide above

·         Acknowledge the other points of view that are expressed.

·         State your willingness to negotiate and compromise.

·         Find a solution that is beneficial to all the people involved. 



·         LOOK at the other person.

·         SPEAK with a calm low voice. Don’t yell.

·         STAY relaxed. Use the strategies for self-control outlined above.

·         Clearly STATE your opinion.

·         Be sure to AVOID emotional terms.

·         LISTEN to the views of others.


One will also need to analyze the student’s behavior to determine what is controlling the behavior. 

A good explanation of how to do a functional behavior analysis in contained in the paper “Addressing Student Behavior: An IEP Team’s Introduction to Functional Behavioral Assessment and Behavior Intervention Plans.

By the Center for effective Collaboration and Practice. The paper stresses that you are looking for triggers. You are therefore looking for the students behavior, feelings and thought patterns.

The key questions are is the problem linked to a skill deficit or is there a lack of desire to modify the behavior. Ask is it possible the student is uncertain about the appropriateness of the behavior?

Does the student find anything to value in engaging in the appropriate behavior? Is the student trying to avoid a low interest or demanding task? Does the student consider current rules, routines, or expectations irrelevant.

In other words what is the payoff? What is the student getting out or the behavior? What does she obtain, escape, or avoid by acting the way he or she acts? One may

Helping Kids Behave Part Fourteen & Fifteen
Helping Kids Behave Part Twelve
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